10.08.2008

Reality

My life is not perfect- unfortunately. I wish it was perfect, full of "roses and puppies" but it isn't. It's filled with mistakes, change, drama... I used to plan out a whole year. Now, I know that life can pull a 180 on you and completely change within 3 months, a day, or an hour. It's one of those things your realize as you get older (don't laugh, 30+ somethings); life isn't going to go your way.

I had a good talk with Matt tonight, stuff I had to get off my chest, stuff I needed to go to him and say, "does this sound like a good plan? Honestly?" He's the one person who can give honest when you need it, even when you don't know it. Nowadays, I'm getting to the point where I go with what he says from the get go- I might not agree with it, but 99% of the time, he's right, I'm wrong. I still think for myself, I just get it double checked by Reality when I need it; and when I don't.

I feel like I'm not in control of my life; oddly, though, I'm ok with it. I'm over the emotion, somewhat; over thinking of the "what ifs" that will happen with my life. I have to take what I get, and I have to make the most of it. As Matt's dad says, "life is what you make it."

If only it were that easy

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